"The way to keep yourself from making assumptions is to ask questions." — Don Miguel Ruiz
Yesterday, while my husband and I were having lunch, we noticed a small dog alone in the woods behind our house.
Being the (slightly crazy) dog people that we are, we immediately sprang into action.
It must be lost, or hurt, or both...HURRY!
I grabbed a bag of treats while my husband rushed to find a spare collar.
He ran out the door while I tracked the dog's whereabouts from the window.
Before my husband could even make it to the front yard, the dog's owner came into my view.
She had been there the whole time, we just couldn't see her. 🤦♀️
So we ASSUMED she wasn't there.
Have you experienced a similar situation?
It normally goes like this,
Something happens, maybe...
You get a "we need to speak" kind of message from your boss or,
Your partner fails to do the thing you asked them to do (again) or,
The scale goes up one pound,
And you immediately make assumptions about why it happened or what's going to happen as a result.
And then, you react based on those assumptions.
You assume you're getting fired, so you message your coworkers in a panic, asking for insider information.
You assume your partner is a selfish jerk who never considers your feelings, so give them the silent treatment.
You assume you'll never be able to reach your goals, so you say "F%$@ it" and order a large pizza.
But those assumptions aren't FACTS,
They are stories your brain creates by filling in the gaps between the facts.
And these stories are examples of irrational or unhelpful thought patterns known as cognitive distortions.
Your brain's #1 goal is to keep you alive. Which means that it is constantly interpreting the world around you, trying to make sense of what is happening and predicting potential threats.
It would be impossible for your brain to process ALL of that information, so it often takes ‘short cuts’ and generates thoughts that are not completely accurate...aka cognitive distortions.
Which means that sometimes you might jump to the worst possible conclusion, or blame yourself for things that are not your fault, or only see the negative in a situation.
Now, these 'short cuts' happen automatically, so you can't completely stop them.
But, you CAN learn to notice and question them so that they don't impact your mood and your behavior in a negative way.
So, the next time you notice that you're stuck in a negative thought spiral,
Stop and ask yourself,
What are the FACTS of this situation?
And then,
What are the STORIES that I'm making up to fill in the gaps?
From there, you get to decide,
Do you want to continue believing a made up story, based on little to no evidence, and that is causing you distress?
Or, do you want to write a NEW story, one that is based on the evidence you DO have, and that inspires you to take positive action?
The choice is yours.
And if you want to learn the "Core 4 Stories" that you need to write for yourself if you want to quit dieting for good,
👉 Then make sure you join me TOMORROW, Thursday March 28th at 6:30 pm EDT for my free LIVE masterclass,
The Secret to Healthy Eating Habits Stick Without Discipline, Willpower or the Drama of Dieting
👉 Click HERE to claim your spot.
P.S. I'm throwing in some sweet bonuses when you join me LIVE, including an opportunity to WIN 2-months of coaching. So you don't want to miss this!
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